Preschool....Here we come!

Today was the little prince's first day of preschool. Wow...preschool, I'm still trying to wrap my head around that one (hehe). We've been talking about this all summer long because preparation is key when it comes to this child. So we got prepared by signing him up for summer camp at the same school which went amazingly well. Do I seem surprised? Well, I was - I was completely convinced that he would cry the first three weeks (of a five week camp) and then fall in love. He amazed us all by loving it after just the first week (and an escape from class the first day...Hahahaha).

So here we are, he wakes up and we are ramping it up in our house. Singing how it's "first day of school" and how he will be the special helper - all the things that will get him excited about school and things are looking great! He gets dressed, has breakfast and of course before heading out the door is instructed to smile pretty for all of the first day of school pics. So after the paparazzi moment (lol), with his backpack and lunch box in hand we head to the car to go to school. The whole drive there I'm thinking 'this is great, he's doing so well - this should be a piece of cake'. What in the world is the matter with me? Do I not know who he is??? Of course the moment that I took him to his class he begins to cry uncontrollably, all the while saying "no mommy, I just want to go home". What a heart wrenching moment for any mother that is - while you calmly try to tell them how great school will be and how much fun they are going to have, your child is clamped so tightly to your neck that it can only be described as a "death grip". I give him a kiss and a big hug and leave my crying boy with his teachers and pray for the best. I return three hours later to find that his crying lasted all of 4 minutes (which I hoped would happen) and he was the model student.

Here begins the new phase of our lives.

Natural Hair Journey

Lately I have been thinking about taking the journey back to natural hair. In the late 90's I took the plunge and went natural. My hair was in terrible shape - breakage and shedding that left me feeling like I needed to make a radical change. So I allowed most of the relaxer to grow out, went to my stylist and told her to cut it all off and cut it all off she most certainly did. My hair was so short you couldn't put the smallest curlers in it. Luckily enough for me I have naturally curly hair so having it that short wasn't really a huge issue though it did take time getting used to seeing myself when I looked in the mirror...lol. The plan was to leave it short and natural for a year to give my hair time to recover from the years of damage I had inflicted upon it, but I loved it so much that I left it that way for 7 years!

In 2005 I decided to go back to having relaxed hair. Not because I didn't love the short and natural I had been rockin' for so long but more because I wanted to have more versatility with my hair and the idea of letting it grow longer in it's natural state was more than a little scary for me. So here I am in 2010 with slightly longer than shoulder length hair that I only get touched up ever 4 months and I'm wondering what it would be like to go back to having hair that takes less time to maintain....or does it?

So my research begins. I've been looking at several different websites that carry natural and organic hair products and I must say I am completely overwhelmed by the number of choices. In my previously natural state, I simply washed my hair daily and applied a leave-in conditioner...no combing or brushing necessary but with the length of hair I have now it has become obvious that hair routine simply won't work. After browsing these sites, I've been thinking (not too silently either) that I need a Ph.D. in hair care to figure out what would be best for me. With shampoos, no-poos, organics, protein-free and clarifyers my head is spinning. I don't even know where to begin and the more I read the more confused I become...LOL.

Now the question lingering in my mind is 'how serious am I about going natural?' This decision won't be nearly as easy as it was for me before. Truthfully the more I read the more afraid to make the choice I become. So I continue my research in hopes that I can get a better handle on what might be the best route for me in my journey toward natural hair.

Fourth of July

Happy 4th of July! The boys decided to do fireworks and we watched the neighborhood ones too...that is until the little prince informed me that he was tired and ready to go to bed - LOL.

Hope your 4th was as enjoyable as ours. And let's remember those that are fighting for this freedom that we celebrate every July 4th.

Happy 3rd Birthday Little Prince

I can't believe it but my little guy is THREE YEARS OLD! Where in the world did the time go? With every day and every moment that I spend with him, I am never at a loss on what a miracle his being here truly is. After years of believing that I would never be a mother, God blessed me with the sweetest miracle ever disguised as my little boy.

Today was his birthday party and though mother nature was a pure witch to deliver us almost 100 degree weather (didn't she know his birthday party was in the backyard???), his friends showed up to help him celebrate the occassion. As miserable as it was (and YES, it was miserable) the kids seemed to enjoy the activites that I had planned and thanks to a semi-cool basement to go to after about 35 minutes in the sweltering sun, the remainder of the party was not only pleasant but enjoyable for all.

My big boy had a great time and in the end that's all that really matters. I'm grateful to have met some wonderful families who were willing to brave the elements to come celebrate with us. Now, a 6 month rest before the party planning begins again....wonder what next year will have in store for us. Whatever it is I'm sure I'll be crafting up a storm to make it happen...LOL.


The back of the placemat


The front of the placemat


The microphone cups


The gift bag


The music CD


The notebook & pencil


The red carpet and stage


The craft table


The final craft project

Food for the Soul

We have all faced moments in our lives when the pressure mounts beyond what we feel we can handle, and we find ourselves thinking that we do not have the strength to carry on. Sometimes we have just gotten through a major obstacle or illness only to find another one waiting for us the moment we finally catch our breath. Sometimes we endure one loss after another, wondering when we will get a break from life's troubles. It does not seem fair or right that life should demand more of us when we feel we have given all we can, but sometimes this is the way life works.


When we look back on our lives, we see that we have survived many trials and surmounted many obstacles, often to our own amazement. In each of those instances, we had to break through our ideas about how much we can handle and go deeper into our hidden reserves. The thought that we do not have the strength to handle what is before us can be likened to the hard surface of a frozen lake. It appears to be an impenetrable fact, but when we break through it, we find that a deep well of energy and inspiration was trapped beneath that icy barrier the whole time. Sometimes we break through by cutting a hole into our resistance with our willpower, and sometimes we melt the ice with compassion for our predicament and ourselves. Either way, each time we break through, we reach a new understanding of the strength we store within ourselves.


When we find ourselves up against that frozen barrier of thinking we cannot handle our situation, we may find that the kindest choice is to love ourselves and our resistance too. We can simply accept that we are overwhelmed, exhausted, and stretched, and we can offer ourselves loving kindness and compassion. If we can extend to ourselves the unconditional warmth of a mother's love, before we know it, the ice will begin to break.

Preparing for a party

I know that some will think I'm crazy (and perhaps I am...lol) but I begin planning my son's birthday parties 6 months out. Since he's so young he isn't really able to pick his own themes. I, like most parents I guess, pay close attention to who he is and what he's interested in and make the decision from there. This year, his theme will be "music".

Picking this theme was a pretty easy choice since he has been my little maestro since he was a year old. His favorite instrument is the guitar but the drums come in a close second to his first passion. Last year I went with a "cars" theme because he loves those probably as much as he loves music. But this year I wanted something different and something that stood out. So here we are, a week away from the big day and I still have so much left to do. Being the crafty mom that I am, I enjoy "getting my hands dirty" when it comes to planning his party. I always personalize the gift bags for the kids but for the last two years that's all I've had to do since his parties were held at party places. This year the party will be at our home and I will be creating personalized gift bags, personalized place mats, music CD's along with a 'stage' for the kids to have their picture taken on. All of this of course sounded fabulous in theory...now comes the time to turn the dream into reality and I'm starting to feel the magnitude of what I've committed myself to. Yes, some things on the list have been crossed off and though the items that remain are not that life shattering, I still only have one week to pull it all off (wow...just 7 days - OMG!)

I do have to ask myself will it matter in the end if I get it all done? The truth - probably not. I'm throwing a party for a 3 year old and the kids that are coming to help us celebrate range in age from 2 - 5. For them, I'm sure the most important will be the chicken nuggets, cupcakes and any candy they can grab when that pinata breaks. So, I guess I need to just take a deep breath and remember that as long as my baby boy is sharing his special day with mom and dad that's all that really matters...the rest will be a piece of cupcake!

Craft Time

Even though I have been working on the little prince's birthday party, I put those plans on hold this week to do a little crafting. Baby McClary is due in July and I went to the babyshower today. Here are the pics of the gift....



This is the box after I painted it.


The final product.

A bittersweet moment

Today my great-niece graduates from High School. Wow...where in the world did the time go. I know this sounds cliche, but I remember when she was just a baby. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to be there to see the event. Living so far from where she is and the idea of a road trip with the little prince was more than I could handle, so at home we stayed.

As exciting as it is for our family that she has graduated and will be heading to college in the fall, this day brings about a bit of sadness as well. Today was my mother's birthday. My mom died almost three years. I know that she would have been so unbelievably happy about this day because my niece was her "road dog" for many years. It's a running joke in our family how my mother used to buy snacks for my niece and how we had to ask permission if we could eat them when we visited or she would get mad...LOL. They were the best of buddies when she was really young and as she got older it became difficult for my mom to let go of the 'little girl' she used to be and grasp hold to the pre-teen/teenager she was becoming. After a couple years of a "rough patch" they found a space that worked for grand-daughter and great-grandmother.

I can only imagine the huge smile on the face of my mother looking down from heaven as she walked across that stage and accepted her diploma. I know she was proud.

The Surgery

On Thursday the little prince had to undergo T&A surgery. He's never had surgery before and I pray that he never has to again. I had my suspicions that the earlier diagnosis of "allergies" was possibly something more when my little guy was constantly sticking his finger in his nose and sounded as if he had cotton balls stuffed as far up his nasal passages as they could go. He's been on medicine for months now for the 'allergies' but it wasn't really working.

So off to the ENT to find out if my suspicions were founded or if I was being a paranoid mom. The doctor checked his throat and confirmed that his tonsils were enlarged but without an x-ray he couldn't tell about the adnoids but suspected that the "stuffy" sound was because of those. His treatment method - take them both out.

I had a feeling that his adnoids were a problem but I was shocked by the tonsils. After getting over that (which took about 3 seconds), I had to deal with the sick feeling in pit of my stomach about my almost 3 year old child going under the knife (which took a WHOLE lot longer). I refused to think about what could possibly go wrong. I'm a woman of faith and I can't ask God to do His job and then worry that He won't. So I said a silent prayer and went home to tell my family - my prayer warriors - what was going on.

Now that I had prayer "back-up", we were ready for surgery day. I didn't explain to the prince what would happen until the day before. Mainly because I had no idea what I was going to tell him. The other reason was because I've learned if I give him too much information too early, he worries me to death about it and I was already dealing with my own nerves. So armed with the knowledge that he would have his tonsils and adnoids removed, we headed to the surgery center at 5:45am. I worried that the hardest part for me would have been the moment I had to hand him off to the nurses to take him back in the O.R. So when that time came I was pleasantly surprised that I was chuckling at my very drug induced baby. The nurse had given him a liquid to take that was meant to relax him, a process they do to make it much more pleasant for young children to go into surgery. When the medicine took effect it was quite comical to watch. He could barely hold his head up properly and though I wasn't saying a word (we were listening to the anethesiologist), he looked at me and said "mama, shhhhhhhhh". The nurse arrived to take him back and he happily went, as loopy as they come.

The surgery took only 30 minutes and an hour or so after being there we were in the recovery room holding our baby boy - he did great. We took him home and he slept most of the day, the effects of all the medicine. By Friday, he was up and playing like he had not had surgery at all...wasn't he supposed to be lying around? I suppose that speaks to the resiliency of young children because if you didn't know that he had surgery almost 72 hours ago you wouldn't believe it by the way he's acting. Guess the idea of a mini vacation for mommy just flew out the window....LOL.

Catching up on life....

The fear that my life would "get in the way" of my blogging seems to be coming true...lol. As often as I think about getting on the computer and writing, something else always comes along and I get side-tracked. So tonight, I play catch-up on a few events over the last month.

The first and most important is the potty-training journey with the little prince. Today is day 41 (YES, I'm still counting...lol!) and we are claiming success, albeit partial success, but success nonetheless. Since May 7th he has mastered the art of peeing in the potty (woohoo). After weeks of wet messes on my carpets the light bulb clicked on for my little guy and we were off to the races. The "partial" success comes because though he is kicking butt (no pun intended) with the peeing he has YET to master and take control of his other bodily function. Lately I've been thinking that I should write a nice long letter to the author of the 3-Day Potty Method to let her know that though I agree with her methodology, that '3-Day' thing must happen on baby chimps, not humans. So our journey continues but I believe the hardest part to be over and the truth is I'm a little sad. Not because I haven't wanted this moment to happen, but because it's official - he's no longer a baby. Diapers were the last vestige of his 'babydom' and I keep wondering how time has moved so fast.

The wedding was lovely and I did look AMAZING in my dress. The ceremony was moving and the bride was beautiful. She's truly happy and I'm happy for her. Being there to witness this new start for the two of them reminded me that life is short, too short sometimes and it is important to make the most of it and what better way to share the best that God gives us than to do so with your soulmate. I wish them many, many years of wedded bliss!

Last week I spent time with my sister on what we called our 'vacation'. You see, every year she and I go to Florida for a week but this year I was not financially able to do so and neither was she. She called me in late April to tell me when she would be taking a week off and was wondering if I were willing to pack up the prince and come and stay with her - our own version of vacation and I jumped at the chance. Eight hours on the road (with no potty accidents...woot, woot) and we arrived a day earlier than planned at my sister's front door. That was the best surprise ever...she cried! We had so much fun! We went to the Amish market (boy do I miss the fresh meat there...yum!), the circus and the zoo. By Friday, we both said we felt like we had actually gone away with all the activties that we did...lol. I miss my family back home and I'm reminded when I get a chance to see them how blessed I am to have them.

Well, there are always a million other little things that happen in the span of a month but I can't remember them and besides, who wants to write that much! LOL That's been my life in a nutshell...no complaints (that I can think of).

Training - Day Two

We are in day two of training and though I'm afraid to claim success so early in the game (he still hasn't made poopy yet), it looks like the fourth time will be the charm. The prince has been in underpants all day and though he has had two accidents he did tell me that he had to go potty and actually peed in the toilet, a success that resulted in mommy and daddy whooping it up, giving him high fives and "way to go's" and even garnered him two stickers on his potty chart.

I've explained to him that only pee-pee and poopy that make it in the potty will get a sticker and if he can do it for two weeks that he will get something special (he loves special surprises). Here's hoping that the 3-day training method has true validity.

Who would have thought my days would revolve around bladders and bowels...oh the joy of motherhood (lol)!

The Training Begins - Day One

Today is the start of the little prince's potty training. I've been complaining (more to myself than anyone else) for about 6 months or so that it was time for him to move on from diapers to big boy underpants. Previous attempts (3 in total) have failed and truth be told I just haven't felt like dealing with it but the time has come to make the final move from infancy to toddlerhood.

According to all the literature he has been as ready as any kid could possibly be so I thought to myself this shouldn't be too difficult. Who was I kidding!?! This, like everything else that deals the the prince, has proven to be nothing like the experts say it will be. His initial aversion was to the actual potty itself. Imagine if you will, those cartoons we used to watch as a kids where someone tries to throw a cat in a small bucket of water and they go spread eagle to hold on to the sides - this would be what it looked like trying to get him to even "sit" on the potty. We have since moved past the fear of sitting (thanks to my former sitter who was kind enough to send me the 3-day training method) and moved straight to complete indifference to the idea at all. He would often tell me "no mama, I okay - I have clean diaper". Just recently I started singing the infamous Potty Dance song thinking that if we made it fun it would "click" and he would want to run straight to the potty and get to work. I'm happy in my fantasy world (lol).

Well, day one was today and though we have had no real success (we had three outfit changes) we are on the road. Keep watching and waiting.....

My Perfect Wedding Dress

Well, I've been invited to the wedding of a person that used to be my best friend. The story behind why we aren't "best friends" anymore is long and tidious but suffice it to say that we grew apart. We've since found our way back to common ground, knowing that the friendship we once had will never be again but realizing that we have to start somewhere.

I've known about the wedding since the beginning of the year and as excited as I am for her that she has found someone who makes her happy, the last three weeks have brought on anxiety in me because I had not been able to find the "perfect" wedding attire for myself. I made the resolve this past Friday to go out looking for a dress to wear and low and behold the 'shopping gods' were on my side. I headed into Macy's looking for a dress but was very disappointed. What I found not only was unattractive (to me at least) it was also too expensive. You see, with me not working full-time anymore shopping is a luxury I simply can't afford. I left the house with three gift cards totaling $61 and I needed to find both a dress and shoes without spending large amounts of my own money. After leaving Macy's feeling a bit defeated, I headed into JC Penney (more out of proximity than anything else) to take a look around. JC Penney has changed over the years because I was pleasantly surprised at how nice the dress selection was. I found five dresses that were cute but I wasn't sure if they were the "one". I continued looking around and found dress number six and I immediately fell in love with it, praying all the while that it would look good on me once I tried it on. After feeling that I had scoured the place clean, I headed into the dressing room to try everything on. As soon as I tried on dress six, I knew I had found my perfect wedding dress. It was everything I had in mind - black in white in color, umpire waist, chiffon material with movement but best of all I looked AMAZING in it! The decision to buy this one was sealed in that moment, so I headed to the cashier to ring up my purchase. The 'shopping genie' was sprinkling her magic all over me because the dress was on sale - $70 down to $34.99 and after using two of the three gift cards ($36.31 in total), I walked away having only paid $1.57 of my own money. Talk about a score!

I was on my own personal high and feeling really good about the dress. I still had one gift card left and was thinking that maybe I could find a great pair of shoes. Though I knew I wouldn't find as good a deal as I did with the dress, I was committed to at least looking and considering my options. I headed back into Macy's to take a look around before heading home. I found a couple pair of shoes that were beautiful but a little too 'matchy-matchy' - a fashion faux paus. So I decided to check out the clearance racks to see if anything jumped out at me and there it was - the perfect shoe to match the perfect dress. I'm not sure how to describe it other than to say it is by far one of the sexiest shoes I've ever owned, Sex in the City kind of sexy (lol). I was sold. I asked the cashier if she could give me the mate so I could try them on, they were fabulous. I looked at her and said "I'll take them". Once again, the 'shopping genie' was sprinkling her magic my way because the shoes were $89 marked down to $62.30. The store was having a sale - 15% off one pair of shoes - and the sale even applied to clearance items. After all discounts and using my last gift card, I paid $15.94! Can you believe it, a dress and shoes for less than $20 of my own money...I simply couldn't stop praising God.

I'm now set to attend this wedding knowing that I'll feel like a million bucks and secretly knowing I paid only a fraction of that amount!

Scary Nights

As a kid I remember being afraid at night, a paralyzing kind of fear that kept me laying motionless for hours. The moon would cast some of the scariest shadows off the large tree that stood outside my bedroom window. I was so afraid that I devised a "plan" that worked for me for many years to come - pull the cover up to my neck, lay on my left side, breathe as little as possible and no matter what don't move a muscle.

I hadn't thought about that in many years until last night when my little guy was refusing to get into his bed at 3am. The fact that he was up at 3am is not new, unfortunately he isn't the best sleeper and more times than not he wakes up in the middle of the night that requires me to usher him back to bed. Last night was different because he said four words that brought my childhood fears rushing back to me - "it's scary for me".

Sleep in our house is elusive. With a toddler that has yet to figure out how to remain asleep in his bed and room all night long, his parents are walking zombies. We are committed to whatever it takes to get our nights back - all night, but when he said those words to me with a look on his face that said I'm truly afraid I couldn't force him to stay in his room.

I know that I have probably started a horrible cycle I was hoping to never be in again by allowing him to come into our bed. More than likely I will have to revisit "sleep bootcamp" at some point in the very near future but everything in me says that picking up my crying baby and carrying him into my room to sleep next to me was the right thing to do. As a kid, I wish that I could have gone to my own mother and told her how petrified I was but for many reasons that wasn't a possibility. I'm really glad that it is for my son.

The Joys and Pains of Motherhood

I love being a mom. Parenthood is such an awesome responsibility but no one tells you about all the crazy moments that you have as a parent.

My little guy is 2.5 years old and one of the smartest little people I've ever met. He has a charming way about him that captures the hearts of those who get to know him, but he has a stubborn streak that rivals anything I've ever seen. When I was pregnant, I read everything I could get my hands on about parenting and I felt pretty content that I had a handle on what I needed to do. Armed with this information and my years of education and training in early childhood I thought I was as prepared as any new parent could be, then along came my 6 pound bundle of joy that has been proving the "experts" on childrearing all wrong. Out of the womb, this child knew that there were things he liked and things he didn't and if he didn't he let you know about it - loudly!

I remember my first few weeks at home with my little miracle. Even though I was sleep deprived and cranky, I was happy to be his mom and sat around thinking about how I wanted to raise him and the person God was planning for him to become. Then it happened...I tried to leave the house with my three week old. First parenting lesson - he hates the car! Yes that's right, the "miracle drug" for babies is a moving car and my son would have nothing to do with it. I couldn't put him in the car seat unless he was asleep - where in the hell was that written in all the literature? It took us roughly a year and a half to get to a point where a car ride longer than 20 minutes didn't mean we were all in tears. Now let's fast forward to the present. My days are spent repeating the same thing a million times (so that's an exaggeration...but not by much) to a person who has mastered the art of selective hearing. Calling his name illicit's a response of "yes mama" but he seems to go completely deaf when I instruct him not to pull the dogs tail, climb on the back of the sofa, not to go up and/or down the stairs or the myriad of other things I spend my days saying. I never once read a paragraph in any of the books or magazines that said you will begin to hate the sound of your own voice.

There are days that I just lose it...feeling like I'm going to literally pull my hair out and that I am the worse mother in the world (usually after I have yelled at him...way out of control) and then he looks up at me with those big brown eyes and says "mama I need a little hug, little kiss, big hug, big kiss, big sugar hug, big sugar kiss" and I completely melt. Parenting isn't easy but it is more rewarding than anything I've done in my life. My prayer is that we'll both get through this experience with amazing memories and little to no lasting emotional scars. I can see this is going to be one hell of a ride.

New To Blogging

I've heard so much about "blogging" but never thought that I would become part of the craze. Well, here I am - blog created and typing my first 'ology' entry.

I've tried journaling the traditional way and it has always started off well enough. A trip to the bookstore to pick out my new journal, the excitement of picking out the perfect little book - usually something flowered - to write down all these meaningful and life altering experiences. It lasts for maybe a month before "life" gets in the way and the next time I think about my journal six months have passed and the light has completely faded from my eyes. I have a closet with about six of these journals just collecting dust, so I decided that since I spend so much time on the computer that I would try my hand at this new (or maybe not so new) phenomenon.

Angie-ology is simply my way of documenting my life as I see and experience it...the good, the bad, the 'ology'. Ready, set, blog!